In this episode, I had the pleasure of chatting with Serin Silva, an intuitive coach and medium. We dove deep into topics like spirituality, infidelity, and finding our authentic selves in the messy middle of life.
Serin shared her personal journey of rediscovering herself while going through a challenging time. She opened up about a period in her life where she made some choices she wasn’t proud of, but emphasized the importance of learning and growing from our experiences. We discussed the power of intuition and how it guided her towards a new path of spirituality and connecting with others.
Throughout our conversation, Serin’s vulnerability and honesty shone through. We explored the complexities of relationships, the gray areas of life, and the importance of self-forgiveness. Her story serves as a reminder that even in the midst of chaos, we have the power to redefine ourselves and create authentic connections.
Don’t miss out on this thought-provoking and inspiring conversation with Serin Silva. Tune in now to discover a different perspective on spirituality and navigating life’s messy middles!
Our Guest – Serin Silva
Serin is a Fortune 500 business executive and author who has launched over 25 well-known brands, some of which are household names.
Serin is also a medium, intuitive healer, Reiki master and certified social emotional coach. She works to help people reconnect to themselves by accessing innate information that humans have left behind in the spirit of progress.
Serin teaches people to harness their instincts and to be truly at home with themselves. Her belief: the world is more beautiful when we can be who we want to be. Visit serinsilva.com to book your free 30 minute session.
Twitter/X: SNSilva5
YouTube: KismetEnergies
For more Sharing The Mddl:
Submit your own question for advice. Email me at hello@themddl.com
Don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review!
Transcript
Welcome to sharing the middle or
recovering perfectionist overachievers,
2
:and anyone in the middle of a
struggle come together to learn, to
3
:embrace the messy middles of life.
4
:I'm Lacey, your friend
in the middle and guide.
5
:Who's claimed a theme this week is
actually like getting my house ready.
6
:To go for sale and it's been
a lot of physical labor.
7
:Which, as you all know, for
me, it's very challenging.
8
:So feeling real proud of that.
9
:, I'm also extremely tired, but that's okay.
10
:We are making it.
11
:We are showing up.
12
:And making stuff happen.
13
:Today, I'm talking to saran
Silva, who is an intuitive coach.
14
:She, and I talk a lot about spirituality,
but then also we do talk about infidelity
15
:and all these different topics.
16
:They don't feel like we've really talked
about here on the middle of, so I'm really
17
:excited to have you all listen and get
a little bit of a different perspective
18
:and story than you're used to hearing.
19
:I think it's pretty cool.
20
:So I do also make a
Vanderpump rules reference.
21
:So if that tells you.
22
:Where my mind is at as well.
23
:Anyway.
24
:Enjoy our conversation and thank you
for your patience in this time where
25
:my life is chaos and i'm showing
up where i can Let's jump right in
26
:Lacey: Welcome, Sarin.
27
:How are you today?
28
:Serin: I am good.
29
:Thanks Lacey.
30
:Thanks for having
31
:Lacey: Yeah, I know I just mentioned
to you before we hit record that
32
:I have been really thinking a
lot about spirituality lately.
33
:What a wonderful happenstance
to have you today.
34
:The world works how it's supposed
to, but why don't you go ahead and
35
:introduce yourself to our listeners?
36
:Serin: Great.
37
:Hi, my name is Rin Silva.
38
:I am a recovering advertising executive
turned intuitive coach and medium.
39
:So that covers off on the
spirituality component.
40
:I live in Boulder, Colorado,
and I'm native Californian.
41
:I have quite a few business accolades,
but these days I really am just
42
:focused on Connecting with women and
helping to empower them to be their
43
:greatest selves and their careers.
44
:Lacey: Awesome.
45
:This, again, this is just me being nosy.
46
:I want to know more about being a
medium and what that looks like for
47
:you before we jump into the rest of it.
48
:Cause I read that and I was
like, Ooh, tell me more.
49
:Serin: Yeah, it's really funny.
50
:You don't wake up one morning
and you're like, I'm a medium.
51
:I was really locked into
my career and my identity.
52
:I was living in San Francisco Bay
Area and I got a little voice one day
53
:when I was commuting, it said, how
much longer are you gonna do this for?
54
:And within four months, I'd moved my
whole family to Boulder, Colorado.
55
:I started doing, I didn't
know I was gonna do all this.
56
:But it was pulling me, spirituality was
pulling me in a way it never had before.
57
:I started doing Reiki energy work.
58
:I got really curious about it.
59
:I had met some friends and I was
like, oh, this is interesting.
60
:And started doing some energy work.
61
:And when I started doing the energy
work, I started getting, information
62
:about the people that I was working on.
63
:That sort of telling me
64
:like about who they were and how they
were feeling and if they were sick
65
:and if they were having heartbreak or
if so, and I was like, what is this?
66
:And it's gotta be in my imagination.
67
:And from there I evolved, got
curious, and went into an intuitive
68
:training program for a couple years.
69
:Intuition is different than mediumship.
70
:intuition is just that deep
knowing about something.
71
:And the mediumship is that deep
knowing and connection to people
72
:that are no longer with us.
73
:So they had us do reading exercises
in class and they said there's
74
:this little dog someone wanted to,
we're looking for things to read.
75
:So someone said, there's this little dog.
76
:I started reading the dog and
I realized the dog had died.
77
:And I started just pulling
information about the dog and the
78
:dog's owner like started tearing up.
79
:And then I just started to realize
that I could access information
80
:outside of the intuitive stuff and
start connecting to people at a
81
:different plane and a different level.
82
:so I worked to develop that.
83
:And, that is one thing that I do
now is I'll do readings for people
84
:who, have family members that have
departed or lovers or siblings or,
85
:I have one woman I read every year
on her daughter's birthday, her
86
:daughter died of cancer, an early age.
87
:So it's deeply meaningful
88
:Lacey: Yeah.
89
:Serin: work and I love being able
to connect people to people that
90
:they can't see and talk to anymore.
91
:But yeah, like I said, I was an
advertising executive and it all
92
:just flowed and I was like, okay.
93
:At first I thought it was pretty crazy.
94
:I was really judgmental of myself.
95
:I didn't embrace it.
96
:I was like, this is crazy and
people are gonna think I'm crazy.
97
:So there was a lot of being in the
98
:middle of navigating these two places.
99
:Lacey: and that's part of the reason
why I'm so interested of the concept
100
:of medium, because it is so directly
related to the middle of being the
101
:conduit of two different of being.
102
:but I very much relate, I'm really
leaning into intuition for myself lately
103
:and learning to trust my intuition.
104
:and for example, with the
middle, I just have this deep.
105
:Like confident, I don't know if confident,
like it's just, it's gonna, it's gonna
106
:happen for like, it's going to be big,
it's going to change someone's life.
107
:And I don't say that as a, self centered
or like overly confident person.
108
:It's just no.
109
:No, it's there.
110
:I just feel it.
111
:and it's taken me a little while to
even be able to say that out loud
112
:because of that judgment, because
of that feeling of am I crazy?
113
:I literally said to my therapist last
night, at what point am I delusional?
114
:And she's like, well, you're not
delusional in any other part of your life.
115
:Why is this one different?
116
:That blew my mind.
117
:So this is
118
:very much, very much on my
heart and thought right now
119
:of there's something there.
120
:The intuition is just speaking to
me and really, and if I'm wrong,
121
:I'm wrong, you know, yeah, it's
one of those things where, I'm very
122
:much in that middle of my journey.
123
:but I would love to hear for you,
what does the middle mean to you?
124
:I find that people tend to have a
visceral reaction when they start
125
:to hear and think about the concept.
126
:Serin: it's funny because I was coaching
someone yesterday and she was like, I
127
:just want this transition to be over,
128
:Lacey: I'll
129
:Serin: which is going from one
situation to another situation.
130
:And I was like, we really
can't control what that is.
131
:So to me, it's that liminal place
where you're, you haven't arrived
132
:yet and you have different options,
or I have different options to
133
:respond in a certain way, right?
134
:and so it can be harrowing, it
can be gut wrenching, it can be
135
:tearful, it can be joyful, it can
be all those things all together.
136
:And you're in a washing machine,
137
:right?
138
:,
Lacey: that's a great way of looking at it.
139
:Oh my gosh, because you
140
:Serin: so you're
141
:Lacey: confined, but it's just spinning.
142
:Oh my God.
143
:I, so I'm going to use this like I
just now my brain because it does.
144
:It just hits so much because
what you're describing is one of
145
:the places that I started when
I started the middle and talking
146
:about the middle was the frustration
of that place and that feeling.
147
:So to think of it as a washing
machine where you're contained and
148
:you're just cycling over and over.
149
:That's perfect.
150
:Oh, thank you.
151
:Serin: And I love to work with women.
152
:You are welcome.
153
:I love to work with women that when
they're at that stage, because, there
154
:is al I always say the only way out is
155
:through, right?
156
:It's not my saying, but I don't know who
said it, but it was someone, a Buddhist.
157
:But how do we live with that?
158
:We don't know when the
timing's gonna end or start.
159
:I've been through that many times.
160
:These, I've been through
many washing machines.
161
:Lacey: Many cycles.
162
:Serin: Many cycles.
163
:and I try to embrace it and be patient,
164
:Lacey: mean.
165
:That's why I started this in the
first place is because I'm not
166
:good at that and I want to figure
out how to be better about it.
167
:I like almost like
mildly torturing myself.
168
:Like the, if I just talk
about it more, I'll get there.
169
:but yeah, I would love to hear, I
usually like to ground these conversations
170
:in a middle moment of your life.
171
:So what would you like to talk through?
172
:Serin: Yeah.
173
:good question.
174
:So there've been, like I
said, there have been many,
175
:but there was one that
was particularly poignant.
176
:I married relatively young.
177
:I was 26 and I met this guy that
I was head over heels for and
178
:still am more on that later.
179
:And we had a child, she was one
at the time and it was really
180
:difficult for me to wrestle.
181
:With the identity of being this
successful advertising executive
182
:and then being mom to a young child,
and my husband was also trying to
183
:adjust to being a father and adjust.
184
:Our relationship dynamic was
different with the third.
185
:It just different, it wasn't just t
and i anymore, it was a slow person.
186
:and that's not unique to me necessarily,
but, I buried myself in my work
187
:and, Someone came along who gave
me the attention that I was seeking
188
:at that time, unhealthy attention.
189
:And, I hadn't set out, I had
plenty going on between a child
190
:and a marriage and a big job.
191
:But, it came in at a certain
time and, I regret following
192
:that urge to be with that person.
193
:But I wound up leaving my husband,
and moving into an apartment and I
194
:think there was part of my I teenage
angst or something that was getting
195
:worked out even though I was like 30
196
:Lacey: Yeah.
197
:Serin: I, because I settled
young and married young.
198
:'cause I married at 26, but I met
him earlier, like years before.
199
:I don't know.
200
:It was a really spin psychy to go
back to the washing machine kind of
201
:time because my identity wasn't defined.
202
:I was looking for attention.
203
:Maybe I was trying to run away
from my marriage and my child
204
:because I didn't know what to do.
205
:And that hadn't really been modeled for me
206
:at my home.
207
:My, my childhood was not super healthy.
208
:so I don't know why it happened,
but I became, I was in the middle
209
:essentially of Being in with this person.
210
:So I moved into the apartment and I
said to the person, I'm available now.
211
:And he said, I don't wanna be with you,
212
:Lacey: Uh!
213
:Serin: after we'd been dating for dating,
214
:you know, I use that term loosely,
uh, for a year and a half.
215
:So I was ready to pivot my life for
this person who'd given me attention.
216
:Lacey: Mm hmm.
217
:Serin: and I did and.
218
:He wasn't there.
219
:Lacey: I can do my heart is, like,
literally breaking right now.
220
:Serin: I thought I was in love
221
:with him, and we went from talking
every day, like three times a
222
:day to I called and he never
answered the phone number again.
223
:So there I was in my apartment
with my, toddler daughter
224
:Lacey: Yeah.
225
:Serin: and a husband who was like, You
suck, basically, which I understand.
226
:I'm not mad at him for that at all.
227
:but yeah, I had to rediscover
myself in that apartment.
228
:I was in Oakland, California, and, I
painted the walls like a Tiffany Blue and
229
:furnished it the way that I wanted to.
230
:And there was like a bohemian
time for about two years.
231
:a lot of crying.
232
:A lot of crying, a lot of self-expression,
a lot of writing, a lot of confusion,
233
:Lacey: and what a change to
go from, managing two people,
234
:to then nothing as well.
235
:I just keep thinking about just
that big change and how one of these
236
:people you will still be connected
with no matter what the rest of
237
:your life because of your daughter.
238
:But I also just think about my experience
because really that first year after a
239
:child, whether it's your first or I only
have two kids, but it is so hard because
240
:it's constant change and it's constant
influx of basically just survival.
241
:I, I loved that year, I loved infancy
with my children, but it's just
242
:so high emotion that I personally
cannot even wrap my mind around.
243
:And adding more on top of that, not,
and I don't mean that, and I realized
244
:as that came out, it sounded judgmental.
245
:I don't mean it judgmental in any way
246
:Serin: I don't feel that.
247
:Lacey: I, my brain can't even
comprehend that high level of emotion
248
:that you must've been going through.
249
:Serin: Yeah, I think I
really wanted attention.
250
:Lacey: Yeah.
251
:Serin: I was working really hard.
252
:I was making, I was the breadwinner
for the family and I was paying for
253
:the apartment in Oakland, and then
I was paying the mortgage on the
254
:house in the suburbs, and, Paying.
255
:I just remember like being exhausted.
256
:and yeah, how I made time
for a lover is interesting.
257
:but I think I really wanted the attention.
258
:Lacey: I don't know how I
made the time it's I think.
259
:We can't,
260
:I think a lot of times we don't think
about how our time is spent until like
261
:later, because people will be like,
I don't know how you do all this.
262
:And I'm like, I don't
know how I do this either.
263
:And so to me, it makes sense that
especially during that time, another
264
:thing got added and it's just what
you did, looking at it objectively.
265
:Yeah, I, that part doesn't confuse me
at all, I'm like, no, that makes sense.
266
:Serin: Yeah, and he really knew how
267
:to turn on the charm.
268
:Lacey: yeah,
269
:Serin: He really knew
how to pull people in.
270
:Lacey: looking back now, I hear
regret in your voice, but it also
271
:sounds like you have a healthy.
272
:View of what you had control
of during that time and that
273
:there was manipulation there.
274
:how long how long did it take
for you to be able to accept that
275
:and not beat yourself up with it
and start to get because I think,
276
:I have a really dumb example.
277
:So stick with me.
278
:I really love Bravo shows.
279
:And I've been watching Vanderpump rules.
280
:And there's this whole scandal right now.
281
:It's called scandal.
282
:about infidelity.
283
:And right now there's a lot of talk
because the other woman in this kind
284
:of has done an interview recently.
285
:Her name's Raquel or Rachel, whatever.
286
:And I empathize with her so much
because I can understand her
287
:perspective and how this man could
have really manipulated her into that.
288
:And I just, I imagine it takes a long
time to even admit that to yourself.
289
:Serin: Oh yeah.
290
:It took a really long time
for me to understand that he
291
:was the master manipulator.
292
:I'm not gonna say he was
a horrible human being.
293
:'cause I believe, I don't believe
everyone's all bad or all good, I
294
:believe we're somewhere in the middle.
295
:but he had manipulated, like many
women, he liked to do this thing
296
:where he would flip the person.
297
:So when I met him, he was like,
oh, there was this woman that was
298
:lesbian, but I flipped her, or
this, it was, and I flipped her
299
:and I, it, it's not like he met me.
300
:And that was the first thing
301
:he said, he built a relationship and then
over time these things would seep in.
302
:And I didn't see it at all.
303
:I was like, oh, somebody's really
being romantic and saying I'm beautiful
304
:and leaving me notes and blah, blah, blah.
305
:But, it took a really long time.
306
:Like he, so he didn't wanna
see me after I moved out and.
307
:I was in a lot of pain 'cause
I really thought I loved him.
308
:I would say it took me like
two, three years and then now
309
:it was:
310
:So now I think I look at it as
that was a really good kick in
311
:the butt and learning for me,
312
:Lacey: Mm hmm.
313
:Serin: that was a really good learning.
314
:and my husband and I, the relationship
that we had before that I moved
315
:out, I don't think it
was a real relationship.
316
:Lacey: Interesting.
317
:Serin: I don't think it was
an authentic relationship.
318
:I don't think the two, I think
the two of us were just moving
319
:forward together because that's
what we had done and we had a baby
320
:Lacey: And that's what you
felt like you should do, and...
321
:Serin: yeah.
322
:And so I, what's funny is
we're like back together.
323
:We've been back together since
:
324
:and the relationship is,
I'm not trying to put a bow
325
:on it, but the relationship is a lot
more authentic and a lot healthier.
326
:And, we went through therapy.
327
:He was willing to do therapy.
328
:He's a wonderful human being,
but it's a much more authentic
329
:relationship, and it wasn't before.
330
:Lacey: Yeah.
331
:And I think why I'm so excited to ask
you about this is because I've been
332
:thinking about this a lot lately.
333
:I'm just talking to you at the right time.
334
:I think it's what I keep learning
is I keep thinking about this idea
335
:that you can take responsibility.
336
:For your actions, but still
acknowledge what made your choices.
337
:So to hear you as someone who went through
this experience can say very easily, I'm
338
:looking at your face, but listen, she's
just speaking very matter of factly of I
339
:did something that I'm not proud of that.
340
:I wouldn't do now.
341
:But someone helped me get there.
342
:That doesn't mean that what I've
done is any less what it is.
343
:And then to be able to then take
that knowledge and move forward and
344
:be with your partner in a really
authentic way like that's really cool.
345
:Like I just, I don't think, I
think it takes a level of nuance
346
:and understanding on both your
part and your husband's part of.
347
:Part of what I'm discovering with
the middle is that the middle
348
:is about the gray area of life
and being comfortable in there.
349
:And so it would be really easy
for people to listen to this
350
:and be like, well, she cheated.
351
:She's bad.
352
:It's wrong.
353
:He's dumb for wanting to be with
her and all these different things.
354
:But it's no, there's so
much gray area between that.
355
:And it's beautiful to me that you
both were able to navigate that and
356
:negotiate that to come back together.
357
:Serin: Yeah, and it was not easy
and I had to let myself out.
358
:At one point,
359
:I had to consciously say, I am
not gonna keep beating myself up.
360
:'cause I definitely did that for a long
361
:time.
362
:I was like, I've, I have to move on.
363
:if I continuously hold this thing
where I hate myself for the rest
364
:of my life, what's that gonna
365
:Lacey: Who does that
366
:Serin: what does that do?
367
:What does that do?
368
:And it took a while.
369
:So one day I consciously was like,
today it's, today is the end.
370
:Today is not the day that I'm gonna
keep feeling guilty about And I actually
371
:said to my husband, we were back
together, but it was still tenuous.
372
:And I just, he would,
drop comments about what
373
:happened when things got tense.
374
:And I'd be like, I understand
that you feel that way and you
375
:have a right to feel that way, but
I can't keep beating myself up.
376
:I can't, it, I've gotta let go of
that And I had to just call time
377
:on that.
378
:And if he had said, I can't,
we probably wouldn't be
379
:together.
380
:You know, and I, you know, and hearing
what you said too, you know, about the
381
:gray, it's like, when I think about it is
I think there was just a really deep love,
382
:there's a very deep love between he and I.
383
:Lacey: Mm hmm.
384
:Serin: and love isn't always
everything, but in this case, when
385
:I think about that elastic band
that allowed this to kind of stretch
386
:Lacey: Mm hmm.
387
:Serin: it was the love that I.
388
:Was the thing underneath of all of it.
389
:Lacey: I just imagine coming
back from that is hard.
390
:So what made you all start
to come back together?
391
:Because I think it would be very easy on
both parts to just write each other off.
392
:And so I'm just so curious about
the, almost the logistics of it.
393
:Serin: That's a good question.
394
:a couple things happened.
395
:The first thing happened was I
was hanging up new pictures in my
396
:apartment and I cut my hand on
a piece of glass, you know, the,
397
:it just, it cut across my pinky.
398
:I still have a scar there.
399
:And, it was bleeding like crazy and
I was calling people and I needed
400
:someone to take me to the emergency
401
:room.
402
:And I called him and I
was like, last resort.
403
:And he was like, okay, I'll take you.
404
:So the guy drives like 45 minutes,
picks me up, takes me to the er,
405
:gets me bandaged up, barely talking
to me, but he didn't want me to
406
:suffer.
407
:And then a few months later, so our
daughter was going back and forth
408
:obviously.
409
:And so one night I was making dinner and
I said, do you wanna come in for dinner?
410
:And he was like, okay.
411
:And I was surprised.
412
:So he sat down at the table.
413
:And next thing you know,
we didn't have our clothes
414
:Lacey: Yeah.
415
:Serin: We were to get back together.
416
:I'll spare you
417
:Lacey: I don't need that many logistics.
418
:Serin: And so I was like, I don't know
what's happening, but I wanted him back.
419
:I was alone for long enough and
I think what I think the biggest
420
:favor that guy did was breaking up
421
:Lacey: Yeah.
422
:Serin: He was not good for me at all.
423
:he did me a favor and he, and
that allowed me to press reset on
424
:my relationship with my husband.
425
:Lacey: Yeah.
426
:I'm curious too, when does your
job shift happen in this process?
427
:Is it after everything?
428
:Because you mentioned being a recovering
ad executive, because I'm curious
429
:about how the different aspects of
our life and those big shifts, like
430
:did they happen simultaneously or
different to, I'm just timeline wise.
431
:Serin: Yeah, my job was pretty
consistent during that time.
432
:Lacey: Good.
433
:Good.
434
:for you.
435
:Like that.
436
:Yeah.
437
:Thank you.
438
:Serin: yeah, it was:
439
:In two, early:when the intuitive voice came.
440
:And I'd never heard
441
:anything
442
:before.
443
:I'd never heard a voice before.
444
:And I was literally driving across
the Bay Bridge in California, Northern
445
:California, and it literally popped
into my ear and I was like, what?
446
:And then I went into my office and I,
my manager, this fantastic manager,
447
:and I said, would it be possible for
me to do this job remotely and The
448
:job that I had was, I was managing a
team, a cross matrix team of 30 plus
449
:people and managing a $20 million piece of
business that was local to the Bay Area.
450
:So the odds of her saying
yes to that were, you need
451
:to be on hand in the office.
452
:This was before Covid
453
:and all that.
454
:And so I expect her to be like, no.
455
:And she said, maybe create a plan for
456
:me and, present it and then
we'll take it to the c e.
457
:And next thing it was like,
yeah, we've checked and we have
458
:employees in the state of Colorado.
459
:And so tax wise, it'll all work.
460
:And next thing an a apart, not an
apartment, a house came up right
461
:near a really great elementary
462
:school here in Boulder.
463
:My husband was like, yeah, let's restart.
464
:let's leave.
465
:Lacey: Why Boulder?
466
:I'm just curious.
467
:Serin: I wanted to live
in a university town,
468
:so we looked at Boulder and
we looked at Austin and, Yeah.
469
:that's what the, and Austin was
just, I was worried it was too hot.
470
:So we came out, we came,
went out to both places.
471
:My husband and I spent a weekend.
472
:and what was funny to me as
it goes back to spirituality
473
:is how everything snaps into
474
:place when it's supposed to.
475
:And you're like, what?
476
:Like you said, oh, I've been thinking
about spirituality, and then you come up.
477
:That's intentional.
478
:That's by
479
:design.
480
:Lacey: It's all right now.
481
:I'm a little speechless because I
think I that really hit me that I
482
:think you're very right of like when
things happen, even though I yeah.
483
:Oh, I'm emotional.
484
:I don't know.
485
:Sorry.
486
:Serin: That's okay.
487
:Emotions are our
488
:Lacey: They are, they're
pieces of information.
489
:That's what I have.
490
:I'm learning to tell myself piece of it.
491
:And I think my spiritual journey
that I've been on, I'm, I come
492
:from a Catholic family, so very
much rooted in that tradition and
493
:whatnot, but I've never really
494
:needed it, I believe in being a
good person and that as long as I'm
495
:doing everything I can to be a good
person, I think I'm doing just fine.
496
:But with that, I.
497
:Okay.
498
:still had those like leftover shoulds
from Christianity and Catholicism.
499
:And it's only been till very recently
that I've started to really think
500
:about how I can still have that
spirituality without the religion.
501
:And so yeah, and like when I say
recently, like in the past week, I've
502
:like, it's been intentionally on my mind.
503
:So to hear us having this
conversation, it's just.
504
:Really freaking cool.
505
:And in the way things work time wise,
is there like a university town?
506
:I have an assumption
about what that means.
507
:I used to work in universities.
508
:or that's where I spent most
of my career up to this point.
509
:So I totally get it of what
being a part of a university,
510
:even the town can look like.
511
:but I don't want to make assumptions
about what, about why for you.
512
:Serin: Yeah.
513
:It's also, I like the
514
:academic thing of it.
515
:Young people wanna grow their
thinking and expand their horizons.
516
:There's a lot of
opportunities for me to learn
517
:here.
518
:and in doing that I
also, I published a book,
519
:I was able to present it and
talk about it here in town.
520
:But it's just a place of thinkers,
who are challenging traditional
521
:notions and expanding and growing.
522
:And, I think as a people
we need to be doing that.
523
:And I think right now, especially in
this liminal time, when the weather's
524
:unpredictable and there's a lot of
challenges that people are having
525
:emotionally and societally, that's the
time to challenge the traditional way of
526
:thinking because we might need new tools.
527
:And so that's one of the reasons why I
love what I do, is 'cause I can bring
528
:in the existing kind of world and then
bring in the new world and it's okay,
529
:what do we wanna chart going forward?
530
:Lacey: Absolutely.
531
:I love that.
532
:It's a place of thinkers because I, as
you said that, I'm like, yes, that's
533
:what I loved so much about working at a
university, is I love a place where people
534
:can be like, wait, no, tell me more.
535
:Like I just, I like
people who are thinkers.
536
:So I totally get that.
537
:anything else about your story
before we go into our final
538
:question and wrapping up?
539
:Serin: no.
540
:I
541
:would just say, we have
to love ourselves no
542
:matter what.
543
:Lacey: Yeah.
544
:Serin: I know we hear that a lot, but
it's different when you have to walk it.
545
:Lacey: Yeah.
546
:I just, again, I know
he said this already.
547
:I'm just really impressed because I can,
I beat myself up for the dumbest things.
548
:So if some, something like
that in with that current
549
:mindset would have crippled me.
550
:So to hear you be able to talk about
it and share about it and show.
551
:Self love and growth, but still acceptance
and of, your actions and that kind of
552
:stuff, I think is something we need
to hear more of in the world because
553
:a lot of times it's that black and
white thinking of, oh, you did that.
554
:You're a bad person.
555
:And then people rate you off
and that's not realistic.
556
:Good people do bad things, it's
human, it's part of our nature.
557
:Serin: A hundred percent.
558
:Lacey: do you have a piece of advice?
559
:I know you just gave one little piece
of wisdom, but do you have a kind of
560
:a piece of advice that maybe either
you needed to hear then, or that has
561
:guided your life up to this point?
562
:I love a little like takeaway.
563
:Serin: really listen with your heart.
564
:Don't listen with your mind,
565
:Lacey: Yeah.
566
:Serin: and it's okay
what your heart wants.
567
:It's okay.
568
:It's okay.
569
:You're gonna be okay.
570
:and when you're not, okay,
fake it a little bit.
571
:Because I had to do that.
572
:Had days where I was like, I'd be driving.
573
:I'd be so mad at myself.
574
:I'd be like, fake it till you make it.
575
:Fake it too.
576
:Make it.
577
:And I would try to put a smile on my face.
578
:And I gotta tell you, I actually worked,
579
:Lacey: that is a
580
:scientific theory, called
facial feedback theory.
581
:Yeah, my one of my.
582
:I have a couple degrees, but one of
them is in communication and that was
583
:always one of my favorite theories
is that if you smile, you trick your
584
:brain into thinking that you're happy.
585
:and so like by the act of
smiling, you're giving yourself
586
:feedback about being happy.
587
:so yeah, absolutely.
588
:There is absolute evidence
about fake it till you make it.
589
:Serin: Oh, good.
590
:thank you
591
:Lacey: Thank you.
592
:how can people find you, work
with you, all that stuff?
593
:Serin: yeah.
594
:they can find me@rinsilva.com.
595
:I'm offering a free, 15
minute clarity session.
596
:If you have question, you're
stuck somewhere, you need help.
597
:I'm gonna probably doing a
few more programs and whatnot.
598
:and then my book is You
Empath U It's on Amazon.
599
:That book is full of tips on
how to deal with difficult times
600
:and practices that you can do.
601
:'cause I really believe in using the
physical body, the intuition and the
602
:mind, all three of them together.
603
:yeah.
604
:And this was really fun.
605
:Thank you for having me on.
606
:I
607
:Lacey: Thank you.
608
:I've really loved talking to you
and I can feel it like in my core
609
:that we were supposed to talk today.
610
:I just feel it in my intuition.
611
:and it feels really good.
612
:So thank you.