Unexpected Outcomes of a Middle with Meredith Constant

# Audio

**Lacey:** [00:00:00] Welcome to sharing the middle we're recovering perfectionist overachievers, and anyone in the middle of a struggle come together to learn, to embrace the messy middles of life. I'm Lacey, your friend in the middle and guide. Who's claim to fame this week is surviving. The house buying and selling process. That's why we took a little time off last week and I'm going to continue to ask grace from you all over the next few weeks. As we buy a new home, sell our home move and try to do it all with small children and chronic illness. But we're making it and it's exciting and a good move for our family in general. I am so excited to share this episode with you all today.

**Lacey:** I found Meredith constant last year on social media. And just fell in love with her thoughtful takes on media. And how they were covering the Royal family. I love getting to hear the story behind the story here in this episode. And, [00:01:00] We also chat some Bravo at, towards the end, which I'm a fan of. And you can skip if you don't want to. Let's jump right in.

**Lacey:** I'm so excited to chat with you, and, get to know you a little bit more. I've been a fan of yours really since you blew up of when you started doing the royal stuff.

**Meredith:** It's been very weird. It's been a really strange journey when I try to talk someone through it and when it started and where it is right now, it's Oh wow. that just happened. That really happened.

**Lacey:** Yeah, it's one of those things where, and I'm sure we'll get into this as we talk, where it's really funny how, you wrote it for your middle moment to be like you left like a previous job and now look at you doing what you're doing now and You would have never predicted this.

**Meredith:** Oh yeah. no. This was not on the list. This was not like niche content creator was not on the list.

**Lacey:** Is that how you would describe yourself? I'm still figuring out how to describe myself.

**Meredith:** I feel like it's pretty niche. See, from the beginning, I was very careful not [00:02:00] to label myself a royal content creator for many reasons. Number one, I know what I don't know. And I realized the thing that I could offer, though, and that I'm most interested in is really like how the media covers them and what's behind all of that and the players and the history and it's like a puzzle to solve.

**Meredith:** And that's really, so I call myself royal adjacent and that's actually been very helpful once I've gained a following of people come in and they're like. So I'm talking about the Royal Family America and people will be like, she's not, she's talking about the media and it's so good. I'm like, yes, that was, that,

**Lacey:** other people to push back for you.

**Meredith:** that was an intentional move in the beginning.

**Lacey:** Yeah, I guess I should officially start and say welcome and thank you for joining me. I really appreciate it. I've been following you on TikTok for a little while now, and just really appreciate the nuanced approach that you take when you're looking at different media stories. So you do primarily look at the,English royal family, I should say, but British English.

**Lacey:** I don't know. Which I have I [00:03:00] dabble in and I had no interest in before the Meghan Markle Prince Harry exit. I did watch their wedding cause I was in. I thought, I think the American becoming a princess, that's a very

**Meredith:** Oh, of course.

**Lacey:** you interested in it. but I just love that you have this really nuanced and analytical take on media, my background's in communication and that kind of stuff.

**Lacey:** Do you want to go ahead and introduce yourself to our listeners, in your own words?

**Meredith:** Sure. My name is Meredith Constant. I am a niche content creator that focuses on media literacy through the lens of the British royal family and the British media. I pretty much do daily videos on my personal channels, which are all Meredith Constant, TikTok, Instagram, and I just follow whatever thread I just feel like pulling, you know, and then I see where it leads me and it's led to some very strange places, some very strange opportunities, but I'm enjoying it.

**Lacey:** I'm flattered that you even know who I am, because I'm like, oh, she, people follow her, and I'm such a

**Meredith:** Oh my gosh. we connected early actually, [00:04:00] because I didn't really start doing this with any. And I don't want to say seriousness, but I fell into it when Megan and Harry's documentary came out in December. And I know you were talking about that a bit and then Into Spare, and I feel like we really connected there because I don't know about you, but I was like, I don't know what's happening here, but I didn't know this was going to be such a touchy subject.

**Meredith:** Wow.

**Lacey:** and it just seems like it should be,no brainer in a lot of ways, and then you realize, oh no, and I appreciate you, you kept going, and I was just like, I just wanted to insert my little opinion here, and then I'm gonna step away from the intensity.

**Meredith:** you know what's funny? I did that first video where I basically said, I don't understand what's the big deal. They have to make money. They're telling their story. Who cares? People were not happy. People were unhappy with me. And I remember doing a friends only video the next day. And I said, that was a bad idea.

**Meredith:** Not doing that again. But of course I'm like, I can't resist the hot stove. And I'm like, but what if I just, what if I just touch it again? Let me just put my whole hand on it and continue. And I have [00:05:00] for whatever reason.

**Lacey:** Yeah, but when you first heard of the middle and the concept, what does the middle mean to you?

**Meredith:** So I always think of the middle as something that I'm always trying to become more comfortable with. For me, it's that gray space where. you're far enough, you're away from whatever you were involved in or a relationship or whatever it might be, but you're not quite sure what the next part looks like.

**Meredith:** And it's a scary, weird place to be where you have the opportunity to make some decisions about what you're going to do differently moving forward, what you're going to do the same. And it's funny because the first, the first thing I thought of the middle was, a job situation that I went through, just about a year and a half ago.

**Lacey:** And before we get into your like specific middle, I'm very curious, do you have a visceral reaction to the middle or a, is it a positive place, a negative place? Is it fluid? What does that look like for you?

**Meredith:** It's uncomfortable. As someone who is very type A, I'm a type A firstborn Capricorn, like almost all my [00:06:00] suns and moons are in Capricorn, I am a monster. But for someone like me, that kind of place is something that I could afford to get more comfortable with and would be actually a really good Lesson and something to work on.

**Meredith:** But my initial reaction is to cringe like there's nothing good feeling about the kind of middle that I see in my mind.

**Lacey:** One of my sisters is the same way. She is like the Capricorn of all Capricorns. And the more that I think of how the middle works and based on your description, it sounds like if you can plan it, like if you can have clear steps, it's not a middle for you because you've got this, but it's that.

**Lacey:** Messiness that it's like, no, I can't handle that.

**Meredith:** It's the gunk. I don't like to sit in. I'm like always reminded. I'm one of those people that like got like a Lotus tattoo when it was popular. I'm like, oh my gosh, look at me. But it's that idea of Being like living comfortably and at peace in the muddy water. Cause like lotuses grow out of the muddy water into something beautiful and pure and clean, but it's getting through that place.

**Meredith:** So I'm like, [00:07:00] just be the Lotus, at ease in the muddy water. And that is so difficult for me.

**Meredith:** I had someone tell me once,to be curious about the future, just to stay curious. Not so much have strong emotional ties to what might come next or what you're planning for or bracing for, but just to be curious about what's next. And that's something I've tried to adopt when I'm in the middle.

**Meredith:** Is that idea of just being curious about this opportunity and where I might go with it?

**Lacey:** Yeah. tell us a little bit more about this specific middle of job shifting, uncertainty, muddiness.

**Meredith:** Yes. So I worked in social media marketing for a long time, about 10 years, and then I had my third child and I was doing some freelancing and then the pandemic hit and no one was paying for marketing. And I then had an opportunity. to work for a website, a mom, fashion blog that I had read for a while and I was a fan and I thought their ethos really aligned with mine and it's it's, I know I'm like, deep sigh. and this was one of those situations where [00:08:00] I got into it and. I never, I always felt out of step with everyone. something wasn't always gelling, but I was really connecting with the audience, but the try on and trying on all these clothings and trying to push new trends and stressing out about.

**Meredith:** Items selling out that you have links to because you're making money off of commission. That all got really stressful. And it felt like I went from having a fashion style to having none because I'm trying to be all the things for all the potential people. And it also just started feeling like, how can I say that I want to be You know, I want to, respect the environment and buy from smaller places that don't have affiliate links.

**Meredith:** when I'm pushing all of this, it morale, I don't want to be like all high and mighty, but the morality of it started to grade on me. And then I'm not proud to say that. The money really kept me going, the money was so good, it almost felt like I couldn't get off the hamster wheel to even think about anything else until finally that decision was made for me and without going into too many details because of, [00:09:00] exit agreements.

**Meredith:** we parted ways is one way to put it and I took it real bad. I took it real bad because I felt like my identity. Had been that company and what I had really built my social media persona around was that and it just felt humiliating just absolutely humiliating and I also felt silence because I couldn't really talk about it.

**Meredith:** And so that was really hard as someone who clearly likes to talk and likes to write and likes to create. But what I decided to do is I decided not to rush into something else. And I had the privilege to not have to do that. That is not something everyone can do. I decided. I was going to step back and this was April of 2021, I think 2022, something like that.

**Lacey:** 2022.from what I know of your story, it sounds

**Meredith:** no, you're right. It's 2022. I know I need a fact checker for me. And so what I decided to do is really take a step back. And I decided to be with the pain. It took me a couple months to realize how depressed I was. And I finally got some therapy to start talking through things, which was [00:10:00] incredibly helpful.

**Meredith:** It took me a long time to realize how low I was. But the thing that people kept saying as they realized I was no longer around was, I really miss your writing. I really miss your writing. It wasn't so much Oh my God, my bum looks so good in these jeans. it wasn't like that. It was like, I just miss your writing because it's real.

**Meredith:** And so I hung on to that. And I started writing a little more, but I wasn't doing anything with any clear purpose. I fooled around on my Instagram and my TikTok a bit. I was making like, like cleaning videos and stuff for a bit. And I was like, this is not really who I am. And then I was doing, I was just playing around, but I realized now I was seeing what I could create.

**Meredith:** Almost like when you're on like a pottery wheel, like you have this clay that you're, and you're like, okay, that's not really the shape. And then you go back and then you build it up again. and that's what it felt like. And I, but I wasn't even thinking Never in my mind did I think that a future step for me could be making a partial income off of, TikTok, YouTube, podcasting.

**Meredith:** I didn't see that for me. And then the Queen passed away in September. And [00:11:00] then I started talking about Princess Margaret, and people really seemed to like it. And then people were asking me to deep dive. And I was like, okay, old Hollywood really isn't my thing, but people seem to really resonate with my research.

**Meredith:** And I'm a, I was a collegiate speech and debater. I went to school for broadcast journalism. I was like, this is perfect. This is a lot of my skills that I have already that I really haven't been able to use. And I started doing that. And then the Harry and Meghan documentary came out and I fell into that.

**Meredith:** And I remember thinking, I'm going to, I'm going to eventually get back to what I was doing. And that never happened because I realized. Yeah. Looking into the media and the larger context with this family, this historical family was so interesting to me. And I just let that lead me and I just, instead of saying no to things, which is usually my reaction, I can't take anything on no, I started saying maybe, and I started, I started saying, let's try it, without feeling like I have to commit to this and do it perfectly for years and years.

**Meredith:** The rest of my life,

**Meredith:** I just started trying things.[00:12:00]

**Lacey:** what I'm wondering right now, as you're talking about, oh, you were testing this, you were testing this, you were testing this, I feel like, and this is something I've fallen into too, this need to be like, this is my thing and I'm doing it and I can't, I don't want to seem like a flake, so I'm not going to move on to something else.

**Lacey:** So I'm just curious about that period where you were like testing things. I'm like, how did you do that? I can't.

**Meredith:** It's so funny because I, what you're saying really resonates with me. And it wasn't until I started doing videos and picking up traction. That it was like, Oh, this could be a thing. this could be something. But even in the last couple of months, even realizing how much I want from it. I don't know if I want to be a top tier, well known creator necessarily.

**Meredith:** I might be okay being, a little smaller. Because there are pluses and minuses that come with being incredibly well known. And for me, it was really so recently I've really had to look at what's on my plate.

**Lacey:** Yeah, you've started a lot of things recently.

**Meredith:** I really did. That was a choice.[00:13:00] So I started in December. I started my own personal Patreon, and that was going to be a weekly thing to share my research.

**Meredith:** And then I started the podcast. I'm working on a manuscript for a book. the TikTok itself, the research and the videos for that is a big undertaking. And so I finally had to get real with myself and sit down and what I do. Is I start doing little experiments with myself because I also feel like, Oh my gosh, I'm going to let people down.

**Meredith:** So I did an experiment where I said, Hey, Patreon, I love you guys. I need to take August off. I need a summer break. I've been doing this every week since December. And I need a break. And people were like, Yeah, sure. Of course. And I was like, Oh, not everyone hates me. People aren't mad at me. You know what I mean?

**Meredith:** And then I started just saying, Hey, what if I do less videos per week? What if I skip some days? How does that look? Totally fine. You know what I

**Lacey:** you are blowing my mind right now.

**Meredith:** oh, really?

**Lacey:** Well, it's

**Lacey:** just in that I can so relate to this idea of I set up a structure and I don't want to let anybody down. I've got to keep this up and all this different stuff, especially [00:14:00] when, one, it's just you, right? It's

**Meredith:** Oh, yeah.

**Lacey:** And then two, there are people who it sounds want it.

**Lacey:** You know what I mean? So you don't want to let them down. So I, that the pressure from both of those places is very challenging.

**Meredith:** What I always try to remember is that if I had a friend or a content creator that I really liked who did a video and was like, I'm stressed. I need to take a step back. I need to dial it down a bit. I'd be like, oh, my gosh, of course, you should do that. And that's what I try to remember.

**Meredith:** Most people would extend the same, courtesy to me. If I said that and people will notice if I don't post a video like people will notice and so I've started just getting people into the habit of I'm not posting every day and I can't do these extreme deep dives because what ended up happening is I had this break in like in May, I guess where I.

**Meredith:** I felt like I couldn't do anything. I couldn't research. I couldn't work on the book at all. Like I couldn't work on my book proposal and I was so frustrated. And that's when I realized I had creativity. I had just tapped [00:15:00] myself out. Like I was putting out so much mental energy in so many directions that I actually couldn't focus.

**Meredith:** And once I just. I took a weekend off. I did a little staycation by myself in, in downtown and at a nice hotel. And I literally just laid in bed, watch TV, read a book for fun. And then I was able to start writing again, but I had to, I have to every day, I really have to like, look at my calendar, see how I'm feeling with my chronic illnesses and say what can I actually do today?

**Lacey:** that, that is another thing I want to ask you about is chronic illness is because I,I actually have a very similar trajectory and story, but with a little bit of different elements of I was working full time in learning development. It was the job that I told myself was the perfect job for me.

**Lacey:** And I was working so hard, and I still am not totally sure what happened, but. I hit a wall where physically my body was like, no, you are not doing this anymore. And I'm most likely going to be diagnosed with ME CFS here soon. And, it's [00:16:00] really, I've. I should, I do proudly say, let me say, this is, you see me learning, I'm like, I am disabled.

**Lacey:** I cannot work like I could before. I cannot work traditionally because of those things. So I do the same thing where I'm like, what can I do today? How can I produce things? and so I had that same stop where I don't know how to talk about this. I've lost my job and I had all of this. identity from my job, and I guess I just, I'm going to start throwing things at the wall to see what sticks.

**Meredith:** Now, I didn't do a good job of experimenting. I was like, this is what I'm going to do, and I went with it, but,chronic illness is a big part of my experience and I've heard you mention Oh, yes. and it's a couple things. So I also like I'm very open and okay with the fact like I have mental illnesses. I have anxiety and O. C. D. And in some ways that makes me incredibly focused and very good. But it also means I drive myself a little insane. Like it's not even Oh, Oh my God, like you got, how did you do all this?

**Meredith:** It's I don't have a choice mentally not to. And so [00:17:00] that's been very hard. But again, weekly therapy, making sure I'm on the right medication has been a huge help in terms of the illnesses. And that this plays a part too, is that mentally it's very hard some days to be, to accept that you have something that is debilitating, especially when you look totally fine.

**Lacey:** you don't look like you're sick and it's hard to explain to people. I, so I have Hashimoto's and I have chronic fatigue and it's. So fun when people tell me, Oh, you should just go to bed earlier or not take naps. I'm like, yeah, that's not how this works. I read an article about how, people with fatigue, hate saying it to other people because that's the response people get. Or when you do take what you need, people are like, ugh, I wish I could spend a day in bed. And it's I wish I could not.

**Meredith:** yeah, I wish every day I could operate at the same level. I wish I didn't have to wake up every morning and assess how I'm doing. My friend, actually, I have a friend that also suffers from chronic illnesses, and it's really helpful to have community. And, there's that whole spoon analogy that some days you have a, you only have, you have three spoons you can [00:18:00] spend on this, et cetera.

**Meredith:** And. What they said is, some days, like the problem is you have a, you have a, Like a spaghetti like spoon,

**Lacey:** A slotted

**Meredith:** need a slotted spoon, but you actually need the soup spoon, and I thought that was really good way to add on to it. cause sometimes you just don't even have the right spoons for everything.

**Meredith:** So I've tried to keep that in mind. You're right though, advocating for yourself and explaining it to others around you whose lives are impacted by your disease as well is very hard. Like I had to get comfortable telling my kids. Mommy can't take you to the indoor trampoline park in the afternoon. Cause that's when I'm fatigued.

**Meredith:** And I also am very overwhelmed by crowds and I'm very uncomfortable around that many people and that much noise. I can't do it. So there's some sensory things definitely going on there too. I just haven't had time to dive into it. I'm like, Oh, that tracks, but it's been, it's definitely hard. it's hard when you know what you're capable of, if you were fully healthy and some days I accept it.

**Lacey:** And some days [00:19:00] I'm frustrated, oh, I know exactly what you mean. There are days where, yeah, and I think being a parent with a chronic illness is a whole, even huge, bigger thing that I'm just constantly trying to get other people who are doing it because I just want to ask, how do you do this? my kids are very young at this point, they're two and four, and so everything is so loud.

**Lacey:** Last night, I, my husband was playing a video game, my daughter was watching something on her tablet, and my son was watching something on a TV in a different room, and all I could hear was just these competing noises. And I was like, I got to go. I cannot do this. I got to go upstairs and shut the door. And I feel like the biggest jerk in the world and my two and four year old just think I'm abandoning them.

**Lacey:** like I know they don't think that and we talk about that stuff, but it is so hard when you know what you want. You've had moments in your life where you've had that. And you've got to figure out how to do those things. I joke that I'm a really great laying down parent, and we, I

**Meredith:** [00:20:00] you'll this,

**Meredith:** you'll like this. So we started, so the homework for my children in elementary school, I have a ten and a half year old, an eight year old, and a three year old. And the homework for elementary school is just reading every night. And so I started what I call. it's our secret book club and basically all it is that my eldest and I started reading in our, in my bed together.

**Meredith:** And it was a way for me to be able to relax because I can't, after seven, I am done. And so it was a way for us to spend time together, but doing a quiet activity. And when my eight year old was old enough and could read on her own, she was she's can I join now? I'm like, yes, sure. You're in, you're initiated.

**Meredith:** And so it's funny because people are like, how do you have time to read so much? And I'm like,I made it a part of our life. and I think to, there's so much pressure to be a certain kind of parent and to create all of these memories all the time. But I'm also reminded that it didn't used to be that way.

**Meredith:** And maybe that was better. And also in me learning to set boundaries. I am teaching my Children how to learn how to set boundaries one day.

**Lacey:** Yeah, [00:21:00] and you're teaching your children how to be their own selves, I think. like my son who's four is mommy, can we podcast? I'm like, sure, buddy, let's do a podcast. And he just comes and sits with me. But it's another thing that he gets to try out and do and have hobbies that aren't just, based around him.

**Lacey:** I think that's one thing that I have really appreciated is my children, while they are the most important thing to me, they're not the center of my universe. And they know that. And they, we're all still very happy and live happily together.

**Meredith:** I think it's a good thing having your own passions because it allows you not to get because especially when the kids start getting into activities, I have seen as a swim parent and I was a former coach, so I'm very careful. And what I project, like not projecting my hopes and dreams onto my child and also being very realistic about where this can potentially go.

**Meredith:** But the way I see parents just losing it over like a bad race or something. And I'm like, what are you doing? Like this, you're not the [00:22:00] swimmer and this kid is 10. They need you to be, they need you to be the cheerleader because their coach is going to tell them what they did wrong. They don't need it from.

**Meredith:** They just need mom and dad to be safe. You know what I mean? And yeah.

**Lacey:** Yeah. I will say, I am going to steal, Secret Book Club because right now my son and I do what we call cuddle chats and that's where I lay in bed and he lays next to me and we like chat and we made up like a song.

**Meredith:** Oh, I like that idea. I might do that with my three year old.

**Lacey:** And that's when we started. He was, yeah, he was still three when we started. And now my daughter, who's two, does the same thing where she'll come and she'll lay next to me and she'll just prattle away. She's talking about something, And it's just one of those things where I'm like, I'm having this great moment of connection and I wouldn't have had that if I wasn't, chronically ill.

**Lacey:** So I'll take the win.

**Meredith:** Yeah, no, I think it's a great, I think finding ways to parent that work and I've started to realize, like for me on weekends, if we get out in the morning and go to one park outside before it's crowded or Trader Joe's before it's [00:23:00] crowded, I can handle that. They know that mommy needs to rest during the day and they know that.

**Meredith:** There are times that I've even explained to them that I've realized that a lot of noise overwhelms me and so sometimes I need to wear one earbud and have a podcast, like some voice anchoring me so I don't feel lost in the sea of noise, which can very often be my house with three children and two dogs.

**Lacey:** Absolutely. and, with chronic fatigue, I've done a lot of research on it and sensory issues, especially with noise, is a lot. So I do want to go back a little bit to your middle, that we were talking through because we got off track, which I absolutely love. would you say that you knew when it was over? Is it over? Would you say? I'm just curious about, when there is a defined beginning, is there a

**Lacey:** defined end?

**Meredith:** So it was just like going back even a beat further when this breakdown of this job relationship happened. It was painful, but I knew deep down that like it was the best thing that would [00:24:00] ever happen to me. And I like reminded myself to videotape myself, like crying, eating ho hos so that a year later.

**Meredith:** I could see how different life was and life was completely different in ways I could not have imagined in that moment. And that was actually really helpful and grounding. I would say that's a really good question, though, because I feel like for me, getting into something consistent that I really like and I understand the direction I'm going in, I feel out of the middle.

**Meredith:** But to the same extent, I now think one of the lessons I learned from that other job was not to put too much. status, or bank on something being your forever, I remind myself often that this is not the last stop. This is probably a stepping stone to something else. And while that's scary to think about, because I do feel really comfortable in what I've found, I know that what I have learned here, what I learned in previous jobs, relationships about myself, I carry that over to whatever I do.

**Meredith:** nothing was, it's not been a [00:25:00] linear path, but nothing was done in vain, nothing was wasted time.

**Lacey:** I really appreciate that because I think that is something to when you switch from a more structured not that was a corporate job, but corporate y type job into this kind of creation and entrepreneurship space. There is a lot more of accepting that there is a time for things and there's an end for things.

**Lacey:** And I'm starting to embrace that I'm like, Oh, if this doesn't work out, that's fine. It's given me this. You know what I mean? And really embracing that. And not holding on to things, so I like that. One, other thing that I want to make sure I ask you about before we get into your piece of advice is you are a fellow Bravo fan and reality show fan.

**Lacey:** I know, I just, I never actually get to talk to anybody else who loves it like I do, so I'm just, I'm always like, tell me what you, are you watching the New York?

**Meredith:** I am. And I have to say [00:26:00] my outfit today is influenced by Jenna Lyons. I am so obsessed. I don't know why this woman signed up for this show. I don't know in what moment of, what moment she was in and what she, I just can't believe she's on the show, to be honest, Jenna

**Lacey:** for it.

**Meredith:** So thankful.

**Meredith:** I honestly. I'm loving it. I know people feel, and again, it's got to get its legs, but there's something so special about a first season of the show when people are just unaware. Even though some of these people are influencers, you are, it is so different being recorded all the time and you have no idea how your story is going to be edited and chopped up.

**Meredith:** And just seeing the lack of awareness from like Jessel and Aaron, it's just so beautiful to watch and they're fighting over cheese. It's great.

**Lacey:** beautiful. It's amazing. I, I'm still, I, this is, I didn't actually write this blog post, but I thought about it,I watched a show, I think it was last week's episode, where a woman talked about her mother being autistic and how that changed it, changed her experience with women and her relationships with them.

**Lacey:** And we [00:27:00] watched a woman talk about her infertility issues and the struggles that came along with it. We talked to,each one of the women like revealed something so deep and personal about themselves. And I'm just like, where else on television are you seeing women who are in their 30s, 40s, 50s, being complicated and exploring all these different aspects of their life and they're fighting about cheese?

**Lacey:** oh my gosh, what more could I

**Meredith:** Give me more,

**Lacey:** I,

**Meredith:** me more. And this is why reality TV is an art form. And why Vanderbump rules totally deserves that Emmy nomination.

**Lacey:** It does. I'm re watching Vanderpump Rules right now as like a, comfort show. And just even from the beginning, the, amazingness, and I will say something that, and I think you'll, appreciate this as someone who like looks at media, and how time really makes a difference of I'm watching season three right now.

**Lacey:** it's a season where Katie got a lot of slack, but man, she didn't deserve it. And Kristen was still a crazy person. I'm like, so some [00:28:00] things never

**Meredith:** I am a Katie Maloney apologist. I don't care what anyone says. I think she is so unfairly sometimes ganged up on now that she can't be like a massive issue. And she has said some terrible mean things. this also might be, I think she's a Capricorn. So this is part of it too. I'm like,no, this is just how we are.

**Meredith:** But she also has had some of the more insightful moments, like when she realized, like when they did that prank involving. Jax or somebody that involved like a fake police thing. She's this is not cool or funny. And she explained it well. And everyone's Oh, Katie, you're so lame. And she was like, whatever, and they're like,summer moon,

**Lacey:** all happening,

**Meredith:** it's all happening.

**Meredith:** She just sounds like a little Kermit. I love her and her nails. I can't form a fist.

**Lacey:** I do, I like, I totally agree. And I think that's. When I look at some of the things, like there was a,there was a point where, it was Stassi's birthday, this was last season, where Tom is like literally yelling at her like whisperedly of having a reaction to something and then [00:29:00] she's trying to not have a reaction and then Stassi is yelling at her for having a reaction and it's just, I just had this moment where I was like, Oh my gosh, Katie is always set up for failure.

**Lacey:** She is always set up for

**Lacey:** failure.

**Meredith:** you know what? I didn't realize. And I knew it But Tom Schwartz is one of the biggest villains of the show. He is one of the biggest villains. If you really watch him, like Tom Sandoval, Jax, like those are easy targets. Tom Schwartz is evil. He is. Evil.

**Meredith:** Yeah. No, and the only reason why Tom Sandoval didn't get exposed as being evil until recently is because Jax Was so evil. a lot of room.

**Lacey:** it's like their covertness. It's like a scale. Are you from a Jax to a Toms Animal to a Tom

**Meredith:** Yeah, you're like, the Toms don't seem that bad when you have Jacks. it's a very sad sliding scale of what is acceptable. You're like, this person's almost not terrible. You're like, James Kennedy has a couple of moments that are good. You're like, he's fine.

**Lacey:** is. Is James being reasonable? Do I like James?

**Meredith:** I [00:30:00] know, I am very scared for James.

**Meredith:** Although I really love Allie, his new girlfriend. At first I was like, but no, Allie?

**Lacey:** She's so reasonable, too. Of

**Meredith:** out. She said, I saw those two. I saw those two out at 1 p. m. or 1 a. m. at the Abbey.

**Lacey:** Yeah, that's

**Lacey:** weird.

**Meredith:** listen, whatever's going on with the Kyle Mauricio thing, whatever. And I said, get Allie on it.

**Meredith:** Get Allie on it because she will get to the bottom of this. Actually, I heard a really good theory of what that's all about.

**Lacey:** I heard it's a way to get better ratings in the upcoming season.

**Meredith:** So I hear they are trying to basically try to recreate the magic of Vanderbump rules, which is this is all coming up after filming. They're picking back up the cameras. But I feel like Kyle has just been too into it. Ariana was radio silent after this. Like it was clear this was real and this was devastating, but Kyle's out there like doing little like sneaky Instagram posts and like walking.

**Meredith:** I'm like, did you just do a pap walk? Like you really walked with this woman down Rodeo drive and covered your face with your wedding. I don't buy it. I think she's [00:31:00] mad that Lisa is it's up for an Emmy,

**Lacey:** that is, I didn't even think of it that way. That is very yes. Yeah, now I'm really thinking about it. I think the thing with Kyle is She's not willing to be the villain, the true villain. And it seems like Mauricio, even though he was the one with cheating rumors for so long, is the one in the right. So it's almost like she's dancing in this weird middle area.

**Lacey:** That then just makes me think, why are we even talking about this?

**Meredith:** You know what I miss? I miss like first or second season Kyle, where she is so evil to Brandy Glanville, like she is a monster. if you really watch...

**Lacey:** Yeah, yeah.

**Meredith:** like first two seasons, Kyle has not figured it out yet. And she is terrible in a wonderful reality TV way. In fact, the only reason she's not the victim in season or not the villain in season one is Camille is so foul and you know that she is getting ready to be dumped by Kelsey Grammar, but she is so [00:32:00] insufferable that she covers up for Kyle.

**Meredith:** But Kyle is so vile in the beginning and it's get back to that, Kyle, y'all need to get back to that.

**Lacey:** They, they need to get back to messiness. They're too self aware. That's why, yeah. And then they leaned too hard on Erika without actually talking about it. And so it just was so weird in, in that kind of stuff. but that's why,Miami was so good this past season. I don't know if you watched that because there was all this like Bizarre stuff and then it was like, yeah, I said that.

**Lacey:** I'm like, thank you

**Meredith:** God, it was. Oh, my God. There was so much and I just love like I bring goat. I forget her name is

**Lacey:** Julia her name's Julia

**Meredith:** I bring goat. don't like goat. I bring him with diaper on. Oh, my God. I, God, that season was good. Alexia is just so unaware sometimes. And then Larissa is barely able to open her mouth.

**Meredith:** And then Lisa with the divorce. It's just one thing after another.

**Lacey:** would think, Lisa with [00:33:00] the divorce would be the centerpiece, but no, she's like a rallying point for the other women, which is so interesting, you know what I mean? Yeah,I appreciate Alexia for the housewife she is, but man, is she wrong like 99% of the time.

**Meredith:** Yeah, she's real wrong. She's made a lot of bad decisions. her eldest son is terrifying. Oh, he is Yeah, he's truly the worst. I'm like, this kid needs to grow up. It's also weird when you realize like some of the housewives kids

**Lacey:** At age,

**Meredith:** are, but also are younger than some of the people on Vanderpump rules, which always freaks me out.

**Meredith:** I'm like, wait, I am younger than a good majority of the cast on Vanderpump rules. And that feels weird to me because I feel like I'm somewhat of an adult and I'm like, what happened here?

**Lacey:** How are they making these? I will say it is funny. So I'm 34 and it was just Jax's birthday and I'm like, I have two kids. I have a mortgage and a house. And Jax is like, maybe I should get my life together.

**Meredith:** I know I'm like, wait, we're celebrating this guy's 40th [00:34:00] birthday. What is happening here? How much longer do these people have?

**Lacey:** It's the magic of, I don't know if I want to say TV or plastic surgery, but you know what? I appreciate them for what

**Meredith:** Oh, please continue to do it. Please continue this mess. I will be here celebrating your 50th birthday. If you're still behaving like this.

**Lacey:** Absolutely. Absolutely. That's one of the things that I also really appreciate about the Vanderpump Rules cast is they, anytime someone was asked, do you think Tom and Raquel should come back? Every one of them was like, yeah. Absolutely. Cause I'm like, you are, yeah, I'm like, you are smart. I don't blame Ariana for not wanting to film with Tom, which is what I keep saying.

**Lacey:** And I think that actually makes the most sense, as a way to still keep up the tension. but the fact that they were all like,no, they can stay, we'll use

**Meredith:** Oh, yeah. It's great drama. I fear for Ariana. She's had so much goodwill and she's picked up the brand deals girl. You get it. She's with her like Dyson. She's with her

**Lacey:** Her taking out the trash, glad, trash bags.

**Meredith:** her finances in [00:35:00] order. She's got a sponsorship for everything. I'm very afraid though,

**Lacey:** We're going to hit a wall. Yeah.

**Meredith:** and we are going to get, Ariana is going to get a villain edit.

**Meredith:** Like I'm very afraid for her. I'm like, just be careful, just save your money, save all this money that you've made on this because there's going to be a villain era and I'm already feeling very sad for it. Cause I, I like Ariana.

**Lacey:** she seems like a reasonable, actual person. I think Katie does too, just for me she does. But then I look at someone like Sheena and I'm like, yes, I do believe that you are a real person, but maybe you're a real person who lives in a different reality than I do.

**Meredith:** she's ridiculous. There's an amount of ridiculousness, but Ariana's speech where Tom is getting do you want a coffee? She's or what do you want? She's like for you to die. And then they sit down that conversation. I was like, someone needs to do this as a dramatic reading because this is amazing.

**Meredith:** It was so good. It was such compelling TV. that's what I miss. I miss like event television because usually I'll [00:36:00] watch things maybe a little later, but this was one of those things where you had to watch that night

**Lacey:** And I did. I

**Meredith:** and it was amazing and everyone's watching it. And that's like the, how it feels like with some of the movies, like Barbie, it's an event.

**Meredith:** It's not just a movie that came out, it's like a full event that people are going to be dressing up for. It's

**Lacey:** I'm going on Thursday night. I have a plan. I'm going with my

**Meredith:** it's really good and it's going to hit you in a way that maybe you don't anticipate like credit is just so good at there's so many layers and it's still fun and delicious and it has great music.

**Meredith:** But there's so much to it. it's really good.

**Lacey:** I could talk about Vanderpump Rules, Bravo, all of that all

**Lacey:** day.but I do want to ask, I do love to have a piece of advice or a tangible, thing for kind of people to hold on to at the end of the episode. Do you have a piece of advice maybe that you've lived by or that you learned, maybe you wish you knew in your middle?

**Meredith:** I think it's really, and this, honestly, this goes back to my twenties and it's just again to stay curious and you don't have to have everything [00:37:00] figured out, you don't have to know your entire career or you're, they're just going to go through so many iterations of you, but they, you're going to find central themes and everything you do that reminds you what you're passionate about.

**Meredith:** And I think eventually, those things come together in strange, but also beautiful ways.

**Lacey:** I used to work in higher education and I would advise students, and they were always worried about picking the right major, and I would tell them every time, I'm like, you don't, first of all, I don't know what I want to be when I grow up and I'm how much older than you. Second of all, you're picking out a path, you're not picking out a destination.

**Lacey:** So as long as you're pushing yourself down a path that can lead to many different places you want to go, it's the right choice. and so I. I just 100% agree with that, of it's okay, you are making your way, and it's, you're gonna get there. Or nowhere! Because you don't, there's not a destination to get to, maybe that's

**Meredith:** and that's what is, that's what's important. And even being able to look back, I think it just take an assessment of [00:38:00] like, where did I go to get here? And what did I like about all of those experiences? And for me, it's always been creative. it's as simple as that. I love to create.

**Lacey:** Whether it's branding for companies, whether it's fashion blogging, I like to create and I like to connect. How can I do that? And this is currently one way I'm doing it, but it won't be forever.

**Lacey:** Well, where can people find you?

**Meredith:** You can find me on Instagram, Tik TOK, and YouTube at Meredith constant. You can also find me on substack at Meredith constant dot substack. com.

**Lacey:** That sounds awesome. thanks for joining me today, I really enjoyed our chat.