In this special cross-posted episode of ‘No Shame in the Home Game’ and ‘Sharing the Middle,’ Lacey and Sara introduce listeners to the Joyful Support Movement and the Joyful Support Network. They explore the concept of joyful support, sharing how it fills the gap between friends, family, and professional support. Lacey and Sara detail their personal journey and how their partnership led to the creation of this supportive community. They discuss the various resources, including a free Joyful Support course, the Joyful Support Village, and additional courses on home management and meal planning. They emphasize the power of joy in facing life’s challenges and highlight how sharing joy can have a ripple effect, positively impacting everyone involved. Join Lacey and Sara as they walk you through their interactive steps for giving and receiving joyful support, finding joy, and taking actionable steps to improve well-being.
Transcript
Welcome to No Shame in the Home Game Sharing the Middle. I am Lacey, the host of Sharing the Middle and the co host of No Shame in the Home Game. And this is being published in both feeds here with my No Shame in the Home Game co host. Sara. Hi, Sara.
Sara:Hi Lacey. Yeah, that was a cool introduction.
Lacey:It just came
Sara:said, you said you're going to roll into this awkward and what came out was the opposite of awkward. but that's, what's fun about Lacey folks. You just never know.
Lacey:You don't.
Sara:You just roll with it and it's fun.
Lacey:I would just want to say, previous Lacey, would be horrified that you would feel that way about me, but I have grown so much that I'm like, yeah, that's just who I am. that's part of my charm. We're going to just keep rolling with it and, seeing where it goes.
Sara:Oh, it is part of the charm. And that's the thing is I love that expression. Variety is the spice of life. If everyone was the same, I mean, why? Like, so I like, and it's, you are, how I say this? The variety isn't so wildly unexpected. It's not like you're going to show up one day and all of a sudden, like your head's shaved, which would be fine if you did. I'm just saying that your variety is within parameters.
Lacey:Sara, I do have to tell you, Joe and I were listening to our season 2 wrap up of No Shame in the Home Game together while we were driving down to my niece's graduation party this weekend and he laughed out loud multiple times as what you said.
Sara:Shut up. Are you? Wait,
Lacey:It is true. he loved your reaction to the sandwich alignment chart discussion. he, yeah,
Sara:I can't, I can't even, I can't even ask you what his reaction was because I, my immediate question is where does Joe fall on the whole hot dog sandwich situation. Is he with you?
Lacey:Joe is much stricter in his opinions. and
Sara:and I are, Joe and I?
Lacey:Yeah. You and Joe are aligned. Yeah. And we had a little conversation about it at dinner and Isaac is also very staunch in the, hot dog is not a sandwich camp. this is a no shame in the home game, sharing the middle episode because of sharing the middle and no shame in the home game are officially podcasts of the Joyful Sport Network, which is part of the Joyful Sport movement. we also have another podcast that will be coming from season one of No Shame in the Home Game participant Sara Berry, which we are super jazzed about and will happen when it happens. It's all about finding joy and, listening to other people's joy, which I cannot wait for. I'm so excited. But, we thought it was a really great time to take a pause and explain Joyful Support Movement, the Joyful Support Network, and what it is that Sara and I keep talking about.
Sara:Yes, it is from the inside. We have been creating and creating, but when we pop our little heads up from the sand and look around and we're like, Oh wait, does everybody realize what we've been doing under here making this whole time, which is and amazing. And we. When I say we, more Lacey than me has been really hard at work making it all. And it is, the end point is sharing it with everyone. So who you, whoever listening, wherever you are, we're creating it for everyone, for you. Whatever you're going through in life. even things that are looked at as positive, buying a new house, bringing home a new child, bringing home a dog. I didn't want to, I didn't want to,
Lacey:It's okay.
Sara:want to ruin it. Yes. Even going on vacation, all can bring a certain amount of stress along with the usual losing. I don't even need to go into. I don't need to go into all those. They all come with a certain amount of stress because something's changing. And that's when we need anchors in our lives. We need touchstones. And Lacey and I, we've been through our share. Everybody has. I don't know a single person who hasn't had some sort of ups and downs in their life. And to have that touchstone in that rock that you can come back to and just like a safe place. you can just say, this is what's going on. This is what I need to share, or this is what's bringing me, or I need help finding joy, or I don't know what step to take. and I could go on. So I'm going to let Lacey say some stuff.
Lacey:So I like to say that the idea for Joyful Support really came from Sara and I's partnership. That is something that is very part of, important to me, that's part of this origin story. In that I have, I, you've heard me talk about the support that I have in my life of family and friends. You're hearing me talk to them on Sharing the Middle. But as I was going through my chronic illness, there was still this gap of support. And I ended up, getting a lot of that support from Sara in a way that I just didn't know was existed. My personal relationships are lovely, you know what I mean? And I've been working with a therapist for a long time, friends. But there was something so magical about Sara and I when we would chat and we would talk and it was always such a magical space for me to be able to process what's going on, to be able to think about next steps. What am I doing? and also to giggle and have so much fun. And that's really where this idea of joyful support came from is this idea that we can give each other support and have it based and rooted in joy and provide that for anybody who needs it.
Sara:I'm so excited for all the people that this is going to benefit because I know in my life, I could have used this at so many points in time. We, Lacey and I have described this as, it's that gap between, yeah, your family and friends. who are there all the time for you. Absolutely. And then you've got your, if you've got your therapist or some kind of professional that you see once a week, once every other week, but your friends and your family members, they've got stuff going on too. they aren't always able to show up with the same amount of support every day. And so this joyful support is in between those two. And I know from personal experience, I've had some events. have gone on mental health for me, grief for me, where I really felt like My friends were amazing, but I felt inside like I had this ticking clock of okay, after a certain time, like they don't want to hear me crying about the exact same thing, but I still needed to be able to be like, today's a hard day. And yeah, it's been the same thing for three months, but it's still a hard day for me. And this is that place to be able to show up and say whatever's going on and know that people are going to hear you and support you and see you.
Lacey:Absolutely. So we have Joyful Support built into everything that we're trying to produce because the idea is that we want to give you resources to be able to get that Joyful Support, but then to get enough of it that you can then go out in the world and share and have those joy ripples and do all those things. That's why, home management for everyone or for kids or for neurodiversity. It's about having peace and happiness in your home. So you can go out and have more joy sharing the middle, is about sharing your story and understanding where you're coming from. So that you can then take that information and move forward with joy. yeah. So one thing that I do want to point out is so joyful support is this movement, right? That what Sara and I are talking about it, but Sara and I also came up with a tool to use that is a way to give and receive joyful support. It's three steps of something that you can do in a moment when you need that support. You can do it internally. You can do it externally. It's a very malleable tool of taking a step or no, I'm gonna start, of sharing your story, finding joy. And taking a step that if you can do all three of those things, you're going to start to have that forward momentum and be able to get the joyful support that you need.
Sara:And even though Lacey backed up and said it in the other you can really do it in any order, you don't, it, there's no like you have to do all three within five minutes, there's no sort of like magic realm, you don't have to turn around in a circle ten although that would be funny if that was part of it.
Lacey:I would, or like a secret handshake that gets too much into cults, Sara. We're not a cult.
Sara:we're not a cult. but yes, this. If you've been listening for a while, Lacey has been through a lot and when you are moving and Indy was sick and there was so much going on and there was joyful support was very new. We just started talking about it and I was like, how do I support Lacey? And I just said, do you want to do the steps? And that was just, it was concrete. Almost starting to cry. It was concrete. It was tangible. I can remember where I was sitting in my car in the parking lot and I was like, I'll just invite her to do the steps. And you did, you wrote a story about when Indie came into your life and you were able to recognize joy. And here's the thing is the joy doesn't even have to do with what is going on in your life. It can be totally separate and whatever step you take doesn't have to be connected. The step you take could be honestly taking a step and going outside and looking, I was going to say birds. But that becomes a whole thing. You can step outside and just take a deep breath. That could be your step. the three things are, it is, it just gives you structure and movement to move through whatever it is. Cause we often feel like whatever's happening is just so much that it can weigh us down. And yeah, this creates the movement. And like you said, you can do this yourself. You can do it with others. You can share these steps with other people. And we have a whole village where you can show up and talk about what's going on. Share your joy. Ask for other people's joy. there's a lot of ways to do joyful support.
Lacey:There really is. I told this to Sara, but I was having a moment with my son where I was really struggling with how to. him. he was really upset about something and we had tried a lot of things. And so I started to do the steps with him. I said, okay, bud. let's just take a moment. do you see anything that makes you smile? And we talked about that for a little bit, and then I said, are you ready to talk about what happened? He said, no. And I'm like, that's just fine. What do you think we should do next today? And so we talked a little bit about that. So you can see, I'm asking, I'm prompting him through the steps that we found joy. He wasn't ready to tell the story. So we just thought of steps. And then we got to a point where he was ready to tell his story and he had those other two steps. for a foundation to feel like he could do that. So I. Have been using it in my parenting as well. and so it's been really great to just have that concrete tool, it's a concrete tool. And so the idea, like Sara said, we have the village. The idea is that the village is full of people who have taken our free joyful support course. So they know the underlying principles and ideas of the joyful support course so that we, everyone in the community, in this community, can learn. Village can show up and understand what we're looking for from each other. And I think that's another kind of important aspect that really differentiates. differentiates itself from friendship and therapy in that, it blends that specific relationship with therapy and that, peer to peer person support and fits in the middle. It does not replace either of those things. Sara and I are very clear about that. And I also want to be clear that this is very peer support. Sara and I While we are self help enthusiasts, I would say, and both have gone to therapy and that kind of stuff. I did run it by my therapist and she said, Oh yeah, that's a good model for peer support. So that's why I used the term peer support. We're all on the same level. There's no one better than anybody else. Trust me, Sara and I are in there doing it too.
Sara:we are. And it is, it is, it feels so good to share it. When we carry something all by ourselves, it feels bigger. you instantly share it and, You are seen, and this is what I've really noticed in social media is sometimes people show up and with either good news or frustration they're having, and oftentimes there's just people out there who are having a not a great day and they'll cut that person down with whatever's going on, right? And that's not what that person needed. And so I always think about, wow, in joyful support, you show up and you're going to get what you need because when you show up in the village. To do joyful support. It's are you in a position to give support or do you need support? And that's just where it starts. And I know sometimes I go on social media and I don't always walk away feeling better than when I got on. And the hope is, this joyful support. If this is something that can benefit you in your life. Yeah. It's to make the good times feel better. And the tough times feel not as tough. Honestly, it's still going to be tough. I always talk about how every, nobody gets through life without eating. If I'm going to swear, heads up, going to swear. I always say you can't get through life without eating shit sandwiches no one can eat your shit sandwich for you. But it's really great when somebody can come up beside you and say, Hey, I've had that shit sandwich before. I'm going to tell you if you have a glass of soda next to you, it makes it go down a lot easier. Or I'm just going to I'm just going to be here and I'm going to let you know if you put a little bit of mayonnaise. Shit sandwich, not a shitty. like it's just shit sandwiches. They're just such a part of life. So yeah, if you just don't want to feel alone in your shit sandwich, and you got a place to go if you want that.
Lacey:And we know that it can be very nerve wracking to share these things with a bunch of people. strangers. I would like to think that we're a little bit above strangers because we're all in the village together. But, we have created the ability for people to submit their stories anonymously. And so that's another way to be able to get your story out there. You can tell people what you want from them as far as I want support, I want advice or something like that. And, Ideally, it's a place for you to get that out and you can do it anonymously, and still get that support that you need if you are a little nervous about sharing personal things. I think we've all found out Lacey's just sharing left and right, so that's not necessarily me. There are things I keep to myself, I promise.
Sara:But what's so amazing is, yeah, there's these things in our life where we feel as though if we said them, somehow we would be excommunicated from a group, from a network, from something. And when in reality, the truth is somebody else has gone through that. Somebody else can relate. And that's what's, I don't want to brag about how old I am, but that's one thing that's cool about being. As old as I am, is that I've come to realize everybody's got something going on, whether or not they want to talk about it or not, whatever you have going on, somebody else has gone through. it's just, and it feels good to know. Explaining this joyful support to a friend of mine and. I was talking about how back in the day, there used to be, you grew up and you lived in the same town. You knew all your neighbors, your family was all there. Usually there was one or two churches in town, so you had your congregation. It used to be, for better or worse, that Things were shared the good days and the bad days and you had that really strong network, right? And life is just different now. Things have changed. And we don't have for the most part, I feel like I know a lot of people who don't have church that they're a part of or that group that they've been with, and it's just, again, that space in between your friends and your family and a professional caregiver or caregiver professional. Professional, professional health,
Lacey:some kind of health, whether mental or physical.
Sara:kind of professional, with a degree,
Lacey:people who know stuff.
Sara:And my friend, she was, she's older than I am. And she's been around the block herself too. And she just, I was really surprised cause she is not one to sugarcoat anything. And she was just like, that makes a lot of sense. Like she just really got it. And I was like, okay, if this is hidden with her, this is good. Cause she's, she's not one to complain or suffer fools. She's had her times too. And she knows. Sometimes you just need a little extra support.
Lacey:Absolutely. And we want it to be as accessible as possible. so You can take the Joyful Support course itself for free, at JoyfulSupportMovement. com. And that signs you up to be what's called a Joyful Support friend. So you get access to a bunch of different resources that we've been putting up there. And then the Joyful Support course, also the 10 Steps to Meal Planning course. And honestly, I love making freebies. This is a new thing that I've learned, Who knows what I'll put up there. It is, it's Wild West because I get excited and I put stuff up there. and you have the ability to comment on our resources and blogs. Our hope is that one day, our members can share their story through blogs and that kind of stuff. And so that is a way for you to be a part of the community. Obviously our social media. Come in and you can and do it there. Then there is the Joyful Support Village. As Sara mentioned, that's 10 a month. And that's that kind of more closed community to be able to share a bit more widely. and then you can be an all in member, which is 150 a year. And you get access to the community. village and all the courses. So home management for everyone, home management for neurodiversity, the home management for kids that's coming later this year. The more I think about it though, I'm like, that's a hell of a deal.
Sara:Oh yeah, and you're starting to list courses, and I'm like, yeah, and I've got 10 other courses already queued up in my brain that I've started outlining for different courses. So the courses will keep adding, and like Lacey said, we want this to be accessible. So 10 a month doesn't seem It feels out of reach. Send us a message and let us know. Because we are looking at ways to make this accessible to everyone. Because we believe in it so much that we want that joy ripple. And again, if one person feels one percent happier, or more joyful, they go out into the world with that 1 percent and then they rip all it out. So that's what our goal is. And we also have a weekly newsletter that if you become a friend or a village member or all in, you'll get the weekly newsletter, which has a little dose of the sharing, the joy and the step. yeah, it's all, I'm actually part of this and when I get to email my inbox and I get I get a little bump of joy. I'm like, Ooh,
Lacey:I don't because I hit the send button, but I appreciate that you I always have fear when I hit the send button, because there's nothing like sending something to a bunch of people and being worried that you mess something up.
Sara:but we're human. We all mess things up. just, we're human.
Lacey:getting better. I'm getting better. Yeah.
Sara:that's the thing. I always, for those who are my age and remember hair club for men. Lacey and I, we're not just the founders, we're members too, we're case you didn't know, we're not AI, we are human
Lacey:We are. The mess and all. Yum.
Sara:And if you are so jazzed up right now and you're like, I want all this joy, go check out the merch. You can put some joy ripple out into the world and just walk around being a walking joy ripple.
Lacey:That is another place where I have random spurts of creativity and just add stuff to the store. So things are just out there, on my whim. So you can have the joy of that. If you are a villager in All In, you do also get merch discounts as well. and Sara and I hope to grow as far as having monthly meetings, weekly meetings too, to have a little bit more of that personal touch. really there's a lot that we want to do, but we can't do it without your support. Now I feel like I'm an NPR being like, this is brought to you. But that's, that's why there is some costs involved and we can't just do it completely for free because we got stuff to pay for and all that stuff.
Sara:But we ultimately, yes, we have to pay for things because that's life. And ultimately both just feel dedicated to joy. Lacey is creating a shirt for me, which is the ambassador of joy. Which I just think is the coolest. Like I want a I kind of I don't know like a name tag or like a plaque like something on my desk It's just like I am the ambassador. not the because more than one. I am a ambassador
Lacey:Joy Ambassador shirt. I'm working on that.
Sara:I'm and bass. how cool like
Lacey:Yeah.
Sara:bad day and still be a joy ambassador. That's what's so amazing We're not look, we're, that's, oh yeah, asterisk, asterisk all the way. This is not over the top positivity. This is yes and. this thing happened and I'm also feeling joy,
Lacey:Absolutely. and I, to bring it back to what I mentioned that this started from Sara and I's partnership, she had said to me sometimes that giving me support gave her joy as well. And so I love this idea that the more we do the steps, the more that we're building upon one another and creating that safety net of joy and ability to move forward so that we can help each other. Yeah,
Sara:going to give out an amen, but this is not a religious thing. What's like a non religious amen?
Lacey:I,
Sara:Huzzah! Anyway, is Joe into renaissance stuff?
Lacey:Yes and no. So there, for a period of time, Joe did, it's called, the Society for S Something Anachronism. Basically where he would dress up with other people, and in period attire and fight. So it's not quite LARPing because you're not role playing. It's like going, and it can be that, but for him, it was like going and having a workout, fighting it in armor. our friend got him into it and then we had kids and he couldn't really do it anymore.
Sara:I love how so many sentences with people end with, and then we had kids.
Lacey:yes and no.
Sara:I just didn't know if huzzah was gonna rattle anything in Joe's
Lacey:Oh, I sincerely hope it makes them smile. I could see
Sara:you, will you give out a huzzah when Joe comes home from work today and then text me and let me know what his response is? Actually shout out to all of our listeners. Give out a random huzzah.
Lacey:Huzzah!
Sara:Grocery store, stoplight, classroom full of kids. Just see what the response is.
Lacey:I truly do not know what it would be. I do not know. I do not know. Cause, there's a certain person that I could see doing that in public, and it's not typically what I would think of as our listeners. So I would love to see what that looks like.
Sara:Random and delightful. That's all we do here, people.
Lacey:I get, you can find all this at joyfulsupportmovement. com along with a bunch of other stuff. Cause basically I just go in there and make stuff and I have fun with it. we, Sara and I, to our core, believe that this will change ideally the world, but individuals lives for the better. And so we sincerely hope that you join us because, there's so much possibility. When it comes to joy and spreading joy. And it's like a snowball going down a hill. It'll keep going along and catching more and getting bigger. And, just can't wait. I'm trying to enjoy the process, but I also just can't wait.
Sara:If you want to be part of our joy snowball, please please go to JoyfulSupportMovement. com Or if you just want to see how extremely silly we are IRL Check us out on social media. You'll get to you'll get a you'll get to know and trust how beyond joyfully ridiculous And real We're
Lacey:Sara, we didn't even mention one of the biggest things you'll get, which is bonus podcast content. If you join the
Sara:which we we have building up someplace. There's a lot.
Lacey:it exists. It'll get edited and put into a feed at some point. But, we will make it happen. This is one of those things that when we get an editor to help us, they'll be able to help us with that.
Sara:to that day when I get to listen to all the bonus. Cause I'm, cause now that I'm editing, I'm always like cut for bonus. And they're all delightful stories. I'll do a little teaser. What was it called? funeral. we do a whole thing of Lacey's ideal service.
Lacey:we get much deeper into it. Much deeper into it.
Sara:Deeper than you can imagine.
Lacey:know. thank sharing the middle, no shame in the home game listeners. just also a quick thank you from me. I was telling this to Sara, we've had over a thousand unique listeners of both of these podcasts. And to say that out loud is bonkers. And in the greatest way possible, from the bottom of my heart I was always a podcast listener. I love podcasts and I always had this little thing in the back of my mind of could I do that? and I have been, and I love so much doing it. So thanks.
Sara:and thank you, Lacey. I thank you to you. Like you made this happen. I would have never done this without you. I have, I've actually, I always knew I would do a podcast, but didn't know how it would happen.
Lacey:And then there was me.
Sara:and then the universe went, Hey, you know who you should meet? The hair, H A R E of Ohio, the hair of Ohio.
Lacey:This week, Sara learned that I listened to her voice memos at 1. 5 speed.
Sara:And I said, not surprised because I'm a slow talker when I am thinking, yeah, I'm a slow But I have to tell you I have to do more voice memos because I'm actually getting some kind of like thumb carpal tunnel thing from using my thumb to my
Lacey:It's fine. See you need. Cool. I listen to them at 1. 5 speed. I get through them.
Sara:If the listener hasn't guessed I'm the tortoise.
Lacey:My hair ness has already gotten me in trouble today, so I'm trying to I asked for permission and it was yes, but then Joe forgot a few details. So then I was like, I don't know what you want me to do now. I already took care of it. Oh, Sara, do you want to do, honestly, I feel like this whole podcast is just us giving gratitude. So I don't feel a need to do a moment of
Sara:Yeah, I think we'll wait because yeah, for your middle listeners, they aren't used to just doing gratitude and they will be like, that's a little over the top gratitude on top of gratitude on top of gratitude.
Lacey:Yeah, that's a little much, but so am
Sara:it was, yeah, no, I think we'll, I think we'll skip that for our regular episodes. And yes, this was like a whole celebration of just joy, which now my day is, this is the bright spot of my day.
Lacey:know. I have to go take a nap now, but just usual.
Sara:Bar for the course.
Lacey:Well, thank you, Sara.
Sara:Thank you, Lacey.